Remembering....

I love Memorial Day! All through my childhood, it meant family time together, start of summer vacation, those lazy days of no school...picking black eyed peas (yeah, that was fun!)...riding horses with my brother, finding adventures in the pasture and beyond...."camping out" in the front yard (we lived in the country)...bare feet in the thick St. Augustine grass...drinking out of the water hose...watching for Pawpaw's bright orange T & P truck in the afternoons. Stories would be told of my daddy...uncles...grandfathers and great-grandfathers who had served this great country. As i grew older, I learned exactly what the holiday meant and that meaning became more special after I married a "soldier". Our kids were raised going to the "farm" on Memorial Day with all the extended family...the back porch full of beds where children fell in after a day of running through the pasture...the raising of the flag on Monday morning...the most delicious food you have ever tasted...fishing...shooting the guns in the woods....so many things that, sadly, are now just memories. But sweet memories. I am thankful that Jack and Sam got to enjoy a little of that with their Pappy. Our last time fishing together was Memorial Day 2009. Sam, with the help of Nathan, got his first fish...Roy and Brad went up a few days early to get everything ready, and to fish....time I know meant so very much to both of them. And, Roy and I sat on the bank of the lake fishing...and talking....about how, despite our family's trials, our life was so very great...and blessed. I will never forget that conversation. After Roy died, Memorial Day took on an entirely different meaning for me. Because of his service in the Army, he is buried at the DFW National Cemetery. Roy never would have bragged about his service because, to him, it was an honor to serve this nation. As a young man, he left the University of North Carolina just a semester shy of graduation to enlist in the Army. It was the Vietnam era. Very quickly, he was recognized as a potential leader and went to Officer Candidate School. He flew helicopters. In fact, he trained at Fort Wolters in Mineral Wells. Who knew this 10 year old girl lived just a few miles away from where the love of her life was learning to fly! Many people called them "flyboys"...said their boots never touched the ground. I'm not sure what war they were in, but Roy spent many hours with his boots on the ground. After dropping supplies, he would get a call that someone was wounded and he would fly his little helicopter in, jump out, pick them up and take them back to camp, all while being fired upon...leaving no one behind. He spent time in the jungle after being shot down on more than one occasion. He would fly out from behind a bank of trees to draw fire from the enemy so that the Hueys could come in and attack. Perhaps his most poignant story he ever shared with us was about his fellow pilot, Walter Olinsky. Walter was younger than Roy and Roy looked after him. Walter's name is on the Vietnam Memorial Wall. He was flying a mission to drop supplies and as he was returning to camp, he took heavy enemy fire. Roy was on the radio with him and tried so hard to help him put his chopper down. But it was just too damaged. Roy talked to him until he crashed and then prayed for his friend as his soul took the ultimate flight to heaven. He tried to forget alot of things....but Walter was not one of them. Walter lived on in Roy's memory. I love to look at the polaroid pictures he took...the times were not funny but it seemed they tried to find humor in many things. Some people think that it's more funny that while he was flying helicopter missions in Vietnam, I was practicing my penmanship in Elementary School. I like to think that God knew that the little girl at J.W. Bishop Elementary would need Roy Tyndall someday. Roy was awarded medals too numerous to name...over 1,000 hours of combat flight hours...the Bronze Star Medal for an act of bravery that was to painful for him to share with us....it was just something he had to do. We don't know alot of stories about his time in Vietnam, but that doesn't matter. He was our hero...still is. Shortly before he died, he began to write letters to some of his nephews and to his grandsons to be given to them with one of his medals. He chose each medal with care and wrote why he was giving it to them. He didn't finish all the letters, but he did put their names on the medals. I hope that as they receive these, they will be proud of their Uncle Roy...Pappy....Grandpa. And so each Memorial Day, I go to the DFW National Cemetery for the ceremony there. Hundreds of flags line the driveways all throughtout the cemetery. It is full of families who have lost loved ones...some who's loss is so fresh, they weep openly at the graves of their loved one...families who bring their families so that they can learn about the patriotism in its most raw form....Vets looking for someone they knew...passing out roses to any woman sitting at a gravesite. Tears flow freely....how can they not...it is an unending sea of grave markers...each acknowledging a hero. Each year, someone comes by where I am sitting, reads Roy's headstone, and thanks me for his service. I did not lose my hero in war. But just a little over a year ago, I received a letter from the U.S. Military acknowledging Roy's extreme exposure to Agent Orange and how that played a part in his death from heart disease. It doesn't change anything...it doesn't bring him back...but it does remind me that because he loved this country and chose to serve, he will never be forgotten. I know we will never forget him...he is the love of my life...and until the day I see him again, I will honor his memory and his legacy every single day of my life. He was a man of God, an incredible son and brother, husband and father, Pappy and Grandpa, son-in-law, uncle, brother-in-law and friend...and the most amazing man I have ever known. On this Memorial Day...don't forget to remember....have a blessed and safe holiday with your family and friends...but please, don't forget to remember....

Mother's Day...

Today, while at Target for a few groceries, I passed the greeting card area. I actually paused a moment and took it all in. Little groups of children looking for that perfect card...new daddies with their little ones, perhaps choosing his wife's first Mother's Day Card, and on and on. I got so tickled at these 3 little girls trying to find that perfect card. It brought back sweet memories of years gone by. Saturday before Mother's Day at our house was like Christmas Eve. My first Mothers Day, we lived in Grinnell, Iowa and Roy took Christine to the mall in Des Moines to get that perfect gift. In the years that followed, he would get the kids up, load them in the car, usually go for breakfast somewhere and then set off for Olla Padrida, a little shopping mall in Dallas that is no longer there. He would let each one of them choose a gift, a card and wrapping materials before heading home, where they would set up a special ops room, complete with signs that read 'Mommy, do not enter...please'. Always good manners, of course. I'd hear the giggles, kids would run through looking for markers, then tape, then scissors. They'd have such a hard time not spilling the beans about the goods they had purchased. Then, very early on Sunday morning, some form of breakfast would be brought to me...usually donuts and milk...enough for everyone...and we'd all pile on the bed for a special breakfast and...the presents. Little squeals of 'mommy, open mine first' resounded until all the paper was ripped off and my little pile of treasures laid before me. Their smiles said it all...they felt victorious...they'd done it...they were so proud. Roy was very intentional about days like Mother's Day...and for me, that was gift enough. He wanted our kids to know that these days were created for making memories, and each year, that's exactly what he did.

As I grew up, Mother's Day was also a special day! My daddy would usually help us pick something out and we'd make cards for our mama. We'd go to my grannie's for a big lunch, and when I got older, I thought that was so funny because the moms did all the work! Alot of people think the greeting card companies created this day just to make money, and based on the cost of a card today, that may play into it! But I LOVE days like these. I love picking out that perfect card...and I love celebrating my mama. Some years, we are together on this
day...some years not. But no matter where we are, I celebrate her. As a little girl, I thought my mom was the most beautiful lady I'd ever seen (and she was...still is!). She always cooked dinner and we always sat down together...she never helped her plate until we were almost done eating...and years later, I realized she was waiting to make sure we'd had all we wanted. She sewed dresses for us that you could've
never matched at a department store. She made memories with each of us that we all carry today. She loves our daddy. She made sure
we knew how much God loves us...and that hard work is part of growing. When each of us got married, she worked her magic...Donna got
married in Searcy, so she loaded up the car and put on a long distance wedding, long before that was normal...she stayed up most of the
night before my wedding finishing dress alterations and preparing food...she toted her crock pot to Wisconsin for Davids wedding so she
could make pulled pork, in the hotel room, for the rehearsal dinner...she made sure there was something special for Marianne's 1st graders at her wedding. Her love for each of us is only outshined by her love for our daddy! And that's one of the most important lessons she ever taught us. Many people compare others to the woman in Proverbs 31, but seriously, that could've been written just for her.

I love how others love her too! When I go to Glen Rose to church, everyone tells me 'we love your mom and dad'. That's no surprise but it's so nice to hear. I have watched her take care of other's children...my grannie...my daddy...and 18 months ago, she stepped in and took care of me again. Roy LOVED my mama! He had lost his mom before we married, but he felt he had found another in my mom. Even though they weren't that far apart in age, she treated him like he was one of her own. When he died, she walked that road with me, and continues to do so today. She has 4 kids, 4 sons/daughters in law, 13 grandchildren, 3 great-grandchildren, and a host of family and friends who 'arise and call her blessed'. She is an amazing woman of God, and the queen of our hearts! Happy Mother's Day, Mama...thanks for teaching us what love is...

Anticipation...

I originally posted this on Friday, but had to take it down, because it looked like Clint would not make it home on Saturday...but, thank God, he did...and now my post has an extra special ending...

You remember...you were little...it was almost Christmas...and every night you went to bed got you closer to Christmas Eve. It was all about the anticipation! No matter what's going around us, there are always things to anticipate...spring, vacation, a new baby, payday, a good Saturday afternoon nap...those things that we look so forward to because they are just slightly different from the everyday norm. Sometimes those things can make our hearts race a little...make us a little nervous, excited, overwhelmed. I remember so many sweet times watching our kiddos anticipate...whether it was the school musical for Christine, a big basketball game for Emily, or any sporting event for Brad...you could see all the emotions...and sometimes, I could feel their butterflies myself!

In the past year, I have learned a new meaning for anticipating heaven...thought I cannot wait to meet Jesus...I also anticipate being reunited with my sweet Roy...and THAT gets me through as I continue my journey here on earth.

But, today, our anticipation is for a return...there are butterflies racing through all our tummies...there are yellow bows tied to trees and porch and railing, there is an American flag flying proudly by the front step, and there is a precious girl...my Emily...waiting for her soldier. He's on his way home...at some point today, he'll land on American soil...and in the morning, he'll be met by a wild crowd at DFW...armed with signs, video cameras, and hearts overflowing with love and relief!

Though Roy was in Vietnam, we were not together at that time. His homecoming, however, was very different...no public welcome home...no hurray! But, yesterday, Emily and I both had the same thought at the same time...he would have LOVED being a part of Clint's WELCOME HOME! And, of course, he will be there with us...

Please keep Clint in your prayers as he returns home...for safe travel...for an absolutely overwhelming outpouring of love and appreciation from those he holds so dear...a comfortable readjustment period...and rest...from the weariness of war...and being away from his girl.

Athena and Lily have kept Emily company for these long 6 months...those cute dogs! But now, it's their turn! Can't wait to watch her run into his arms...right where she belongs...counting the hours...in anticipation...

SO.....on Friday afternoon, Emily called and said "he's not gonna be home tomorrow". So, quickly, I took this post down! I had no idea what to say to her...such disappointment...but still hopeful that he would get home soon!

Around lunchtime on Saturday, Christine texted me and said "hey, we're all going to go to Emily and Clint's for lunch around 2:00...to cheer her up..." And, so I got some dessert together...she wanted bar-b-que...so Matt and Christine took care of that. On my way, I stopped to pick up paper towels and toilet paper (this information totally plays into the story...).

When I got there, my arms were loaded with the paper goods and I had a bag with the dessert stuff in it. I walked in, trying to think of what encouraging words I could offer to my Em. I looked up and Clint walked around the corner. I don't know exactly what happened next, but apparently, I dropped everything in my arms. And then I just remember hugging him...and crying...SO HAPPY! Apparently, he flew all through the night trying to get home and only had a little bit of time to get a hold of Emily...so they had a sweet reunion at the airport and then...pulled a fast one on all of us!

I can't even put into words the thankfulness that poured from my heart...both for Clint's safe return...and for the answered prayers to GET HIM HOME.

I love anticipation...those warm, happy feelings it gives you...but in this case, I love the end result better...WELCOME HOME, Clinton!

Blogging again...

I have been wanting to blog again...I have even thought about what I will share...of course, there will be plenty Mimi/Grandma Mindy stories...but alot of my writing will be about my journey during these past 17 months...a journey, I now realize, that will be part of my forever journey. I have prayed...and asked God to guide me...and maybe even help someone else...some of it may not be pretty, but it will be honest...and real. For those of you who have asked me to do this...and encouraged me...thank you. Still Mimi's Corner, what I share about my loss will be called 'Dancing Through My Grief.' Why? For several reasons...on our first date, we danced...in the wee hours of the morning he died, we danced...all dressed up-he in that groovy hospital gown, me-in some very attractive sweats...one of the sweetest memories ever...

Blessings to share...

Over the past several months, I've had the chance for reflection...and lots of it. There are so many things I am capable of doing...but the events last fall totally shook my confidence. I am beginning to rebuild my life, slowly, but deliberately. It's time to try to reengage in things we did as a couple and find mysel a place as just one. One...very blessed one. Later today, I will begin my trip to Nashville that I have wanted to take for months, but scheduling was another matter. But, because of that, I have the unique opportunity to take some much needed supplies to some flood victims, in particular, to families at a school where my niece teaches. These families were hit hard and are struggling to rebuild their lives. There's a similarity there to my life...and I believe God guided me to do this to remind me there are many hurting people in this country! I collected some things on my own, and later this morning, I will head to Fort Worth Christian School to pick up some things they have collected there. My prayer for my trip is that I can be the hands and feet of Jesus to someone there. On a brighter note, I will be getting some much needed sister time with my older sister, Donna, and her family. Blessings to share...sure, lots of them, but the blessings I share will pale in comparison to the ones I will receive. I'll post pictures along the way. Please pray for safe travel for me...and don't forget to pray for the people of Middle Tennessee...blessings...

Let's help Nashville!

I haven't posted in awhile and I have missed blogging! So I am back! This post is a plea for help for the wonderful people of Nashville and surrounding towns. By now, we've all heard about the flooding there...even though the news was a bit slow getting the story out! My older sister lives in Franklin and has seen the devastation firsthand! My niece is student teaching in an area where people lost everything! Please help 'Pack my Expedition' for these good people! Dropoff at my house on Tuesday, May 11, Wednesday, May 12, or Thursday, May 13 from 2-5 PM. If those times don't work for you, call me and I'll come pick it up! Here's the list...it grows every day so keep checking back... I am hoping I get so much I have to rent a UHaul!!!
Clorox wipes, trash age, sox, underwear and tshirts size 6- Adult, ALL toiletries. Toothbrushes and toothpaste, snack foods, paper towels, hand sanitized and hand soap, small toys such as hot wheels, Polly pockets, colors and coloring books, books. We also need giftcards to Walmart, Home Depot and Lowes. I will keep adding things...come on TEXAS...let's help our friends in Tennessee! Be blessed!

I miss you...

Later this morning, i will go and do the most difficult thing i have ever had to do...make funeral arrangements for the love of my life. My precious, precious Roy passed away during a catastrophic triple bypass on Thursday night. Oh, how my heart aches to just have a little more time with the only man i have every loved. But I know that he is whole again, and that he is loving being with his dad, who he lost at the tender age of 16. I am certain that his dad and mom met him at the gates to the most beautiful kingdom he has every seen, and ushered their firstborn into his new home. I know that God will guide us down this difficult road, but i miss him...terribly. My heart is broken...i just wasn't ready for him to go...but he was. His fight had been difficult...too many battles for one man to face...and his sweet body just gave out. He blessed my life for 30 years and gave me 3 wonderful children, 2 amazing stepsons and 6 beautiful grandchildren. I miss him...so much.